I’ve been a dieter all my life, I hated my body from a young age. It simply didn’t look the way it was supposed to.
My body was so capable and I was good at gymnastics and ballet, but I didn’t look like a gymnast or a ballerina!
My body was so good at running and lifting weights but I didn’t look like a runner or someone who worked out.
I was ashamed. I longed to be slight and little, I felt there was a thin girl just waiting to be released from the inside..if only I could just control myself!
Control took over my life from the age of 17, I started that first diet and the control took over. From then on I was always dieting, trying new things, shaming myself into dieting harder. Hiding my body, deleting pictures, and generally just not being present in my life. I was consumed by succeeding, I thought of little else other than food and exercise. It occupied my brain 24/7.
I wanted peace, I was exhausted. I discovered intuitive eating and the health at every size movement by pure accident and suddenly I realised it’s actually the dieting that was keeping me feeling out of control with food.
I read, studied and consumed it all but like many I was lured back in...one final diet, let’s just check it’s not me, let’s just check it doesn’t work.
I didn’t. It won’t. I was yet again slightly thinner but still unhappy!
That’s when I finally let go, I made peace with my body and decided to become a diet recovery coach to help other women like me get the same peace with food and their body.
What was your reason for wanting to take part?
As my daughter grows I want her to know she is more than her size or shape, I want her to feel proud of her body and what it can do and not spend a lifetime picking it apart like I did.
How did you feel following the session?
I just felt so empowered by the experience, I’ve never looked at my body in that way or celebrated it like that and it helped me to see how far I had come on my own journey of body acceptance.
What was your reaction when you saw the final images?
Amazed and proud, the softness and the textures of my body are what make me unique and tell story of my life. I’ve put my body through hell with years of over exercise and punishing meal plans all in the name of beauty and despite all that my body is still here for me, still beautiful, still healthy and I will be forever grateful to it for being patient with me.